South Park Rally Review


For PlayStation

Rating: Crappy
   As a big fan of South Park, I was really looking forward to South Park 
Rally, but I was disgusted to find that it's one of the worst games I've 
ever played.  Not even the hilarious underwear-stealing gnomes can save 
this game.
   South Park Rally is poorly designed in just about every way possible.  
The physics engine is almost non-existent.  The controls are about as loose 
and frustrating as they could possibly be.  The loading times are horrible, 
especially when you consider that Acclaim has had five years to figure out 
ways to minimize loading on the PlayStation.
   One of this game's biggest problems is that it completely lacks a sense 
of speed and excitement.  While Crash Team Racing always has an underlying 
feeling of intensity, South Park Rally is one of the slowest, least intense 
racing games ever released.  Even if you hit a turbo right before a jump, 
you'll still be going slowly.
   The track designs are very plain and unimaginative, and they feel like 
they were thrown together very quickly.  It also says a lot about how
un-focused the tracks are when you can be driving the wrong way on them 
and not even notice.  How is this possible, you ask?  Well, Acclaim has 
worked out a sure-fire formula to confuse gamers nationwide.  The formula 
goes something like this:

Very generic buildings and other landmarks that aren't distinguishable from
one another + fickle control that often causes you drive off course + 
tracks that are way too wide-open = It's way too damn easy to be going the
wrong way and not even know it.

   The music is very repetitive, and how it doesn't fit in with the game at
all.  The sound effects are also very repetitive, including characters that 
say the same un-funny thing every single time they pick up an item (like 
Cartman's "This will help me win!").
   South Park Rally's jokes are even more repetitive than its sound.  As in 
some episodes of the TV series, the jokes can start to wear thin after a 
while.  For example, it's fairly funny the first time you use a fart turbo, 
but not the 30th time.
   Like I said before, I'm a big fan of South Park, and I firmly believe 
that a game with South Park's characters and personality could be excellent.  
Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like Acclaim is concerned with making 
quality games.  They just want to make as much money as possible off of the 
South Park license before its popularity dies down any more than it already 
has.  Yet again, Acclaim has chosen quick money over game quality.  That 
philosophy almost put Acclaim out of business several years ago, and I 
can't help but get the feeling that Acclaim is going to pay the price if 
they don't clean up their act soon.	 

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